Online counselling for autistic adults

I provide online counselling across Canada for autistic humans and humans with autism, depending on your preference to identify yourself! My practice is informed by both training and lived experience.

My practice focuses on high-masking, late-diagnosed, and adult-diagnosed autism.

Are you suspecting that you might be a high-masking autistic? Some of these experiences may resonate with you:

  • Skilled at being a social chameleon and adapting to fit into different groups while experiencing intense anxiety, especially social anxiety. Despite our chameleon skills, we often struggle to form and maintain deeper friendships.

  • A grocery store feels like the final boss in a video game. The lights, sounds, crowds, and feeling of being perceived gives us the heebie jeebies before we even make it to the checkout.

  • Being rejected, disagreeing with, and disappointing someone are all terrifying experiences. Authority figures automatically make us feel like we’re in trouble.

  • Struggling to know when it’s our turn to talk or feeling nonverbal, which might also happen when upset or overwhelmed

  • Identifying as an empath or highly sensitive person (HSP) and experiencing big emotions, like hours of crying, sometimes over seemingly small things. Despite being in tune with others’ emotions, we frequently struggle to identify or name our own feelings.

  • “Type A” behaviour, like detailed organization and routine, lessen our stress. We tend to have rules for ourselves that others don’t understand, like needing to look at a restaurant’s menu in advance.

  • Our ruminating and overthinking skills are buff and feeling “second hand cringe” is unbearable.

  • Repeating movie lines, twirling hair, clenching toes, listening to the same songs on repeat, picking or biting lips, nails, or cheeks… might feel soothing or unconscious

  • Accumulating a number of diagnoses that may (or may not) have felt accurate: bipolar, borderline personality disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, ADHD, generalized or social anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, or an eating disorder

  • Talking to healthcare provider about autism and leaving feeling anxious and dejected. They might have laughed or immediately shut the conversation down.

Autism continues to be under-recognised and under-diagnosed in many communities, particularly among people whose experience falls outside the typical stereotypes. This can make it difficult to recognise ourselves in the current descriptions of autism and to be taken seriously when we seek support. For many people, the years of masking, adapting, and pushing can lead to autistic burnout.

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Autistic Burnout and Counselling

We live in a neurotypical world, and that’s exhausting. Autistic burnout occurs when our chronic stress, masking, sensory demands, and daily life load outweighs our ability to recover. It can happen anytime after significant exertion and is common in late-diagnosed adults. Are you experiencing any of the following?

  • Previous high achievement and organization is no longer possible.

  • Getting home for the day and collapsing into a metaphorical (but feels literal) mud puddle

  • Extreme and ongoing fatigue, irritability, and sensory sensitivities (is the grocery store final boss now unbeatable?)

  • Hobbies, interests, and loved ones feel like a chore

  • Less motivation, ability to get momentum, and communication abilities

  • Symptoms of depression (burnout can manifest like depression, and both can be present)

  • More prevalent thoughts of suicide and self-harm

  • Decreased cognitive function and brain fog

So, you’re in autistic burnout.

Now what?

Clusters of pale pink wildflowers with delicate seed heads and stems in soft natural light, representing gentleness and recovery

One of the hardest parts of autistic burnout is acknowledging that the things we do to survive are not working and often need significant change.

There is no one-fits-all approach for autistic burnout, but there are several approaches we can explore. This includes additional decompression periods and sensory breaks, identifying the early signs of burnout, exploring when masking serves you and when it comes at too high of a cost, meeting physical needs, and requesting support.

Recovery takes time, but it’s possible.

Late-diagnosed neurodivergence, including autism, is a foundation of my virtual practice.

Recognizing autistic traits in ourselves can bring a massive sense of relief, but it’s also complicated. Here’s some of the ways I can support you:

  • Exploring a formal diagnosis versus self-identifying

  • Building sensory toolkits attuned to your sensory experience

  • Managing intense emotions, like shutdowns and meltdowns

  • Strengthening self-compassion, acceptance, and identity

  • Navigating accommodations and Boundaries (yes, with a capital B!)

  • Safely removing the mask and camouflaging techniques that are conscious and unconscious

  • Dropping the internal narratives that no longer work for you and replacing them with a new story

  • Challenging internalized ableism and self-doubt after diagnosis (Are you even a late-diagnosed neurodivergent if you don’t doubt your diagnosis after years of thinking you might be neurodivergent?!)

Sometimes the most crucial component of counselling is simply being witnessed and validated.

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Frequently Asked Questions about Autism and Counselling

  • Yes! Multiple times over. You can read more about me here, and you’re welcome to ask further questions.

  • It’s similar, yet different. Autism often becomes a huge part of our identity and challenges our previous narratives. Our work pulls all those threads together. In addition, unfortunately, we live in a world where autism is often considered a detriment, while simultaneously being rejected for not fitting the stereotype. You’ve probably experienced this, and working with a professional who is familiar with the nuance of adult diagnosis can make a significant difference.

  • Masking and camouflaging are often used synonymously. Both refer to the conscious and unconscious systems used to mask overt, externalized, or obvious behaviours. Masking can look like many things: low-key stimming, forcing eye contact, socially normal but uncomfortable clothes, and mirroring body language. Masking looks different for everyone, and that’s something we can explore.

  • Absolutely not.

  • Counselling can help in many ways: setting boundaries, identifying feelings and sensory experiences, challenging internal discrimination against autism, imposter syndrome and self-doubt, and reframing your past. Though adult- or late-diagnosed autism tends to have its own set of relatable experiences, counselling is different for everyone.

  • You don’t need a diagnosis to start working with me. Not having a diagnosis is common, especially with the inaccessibility of an autism diagnosis. Many clients come to me still deciding if a formal assessment is worthwhile or not. We can explore that together and work on what you’re experiencing right now.

    Self-identifying as autistic is valid. I am a neuro-affirming counsellor, and I don’t consider self-diagnosis to be jumping on the bandwagon. It’s often a deep reflection with detailed research, and it’s legit!

  • Autism assessments and diagnosis is outside of my cope. If you’re interested in an autism assessment, I’m happy to connect you with professioals who have expertise in assessment and diagnosis.

  • Yes, I offer online counselling to clients in Canada’s unregulated provinces and territories, including British Columbia, Alberta, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, Newfoundland & Labrador, Yukon, Nunavut, and Northwest Territories.